What is your child’s personality style?? If you understand your child’s
personality style, it will help you appreciate and develop your child’s
unique strengths. It will significantly enhance your ability to nurture and
discipline your child. If you have more than one child, you already
know that what works with one may not work with the other. You
probably find that you have to communicate and nurture each of your
children differently. The following information may help you understand
why.
Since the time of Hippocrates, it has been theorized that there are 4
basic personality styles. Each of us is a unique blend of those 4
personality styles, there is no right, wrong, or better personality style to
have. It is important that you understand that your child’s personality
style is only one of the factors influencing her temperament and
behavior.
Robert Rohm, Ph.D. has developed a system that makes it easy for us
to categorize, understand and communicate with each other about the
personality styles. He refers to this as the DISC system. Dr. Rohm’s
visual representation for this follows and is a helpful aid.
To help determine your child’s unique style, first decide if your child
seems outgoing or reserved. The outgoing child will be quicker to get
comfortable with new people or situations. The reserved child may
take longer to be comfortable with new people or make friends. If she
is outgoing, her most dominant personality style belongs in the upper
half of the circle. If she seems more reserved her primary personality
style is in the lower half of the circle.
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Then you need to decide if your child is more people- oriented or task-
oriented. The people-oriented child puts people ahead of getting a job
done. The task-oriented child may put more emphasis on
accomplishing a task. If more people oriented, your child’s dominant
personality style is on the right of the circle, if task oriented, on the
left.
Now that you have a sense for your child’s most dominant style, it will
be helpful to understand the behaviors that are commonly seen in that
personality. However, since we are each a unique blend of personality
styles, your child is likely to show behavior traits in more than one
category. Dr. Rohm has given us the following list of descriptors for
each personality style:
D - outgoing and task-oriented I- outgoing and people-oriented
dominant inspirational
direct influencing
demanding inducing
decisive interactive
determined impressive
doer interested in people
C -reserved and task- oriented S - reserved and people- oriented
cautious steady
calculating stable
competent supportive
compliant sensitive
contemplative status quo
careful specialist
I hope this has peaked your interest to learn more!! If you are
struggling with determining your child’s style or would like to read
information about how to more effectively parent your child, following
are two great references - don’t forget to share them with your child’s
teacher!!
All About Bots! All About You!, by Dr. Robert Rohm, Personality
Insights, Inc.
Different Children, Different Needs, by Charles F. Boyd, Multnomah
Books.
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